Many Days Like This

Today was not my best parenting day. It’s not because I snapped or got too emotional or really anything that bad. But I know that I want on my A-game.

I’m still so freshly new to this parenting thing. I’m surprised I haven’t gotten to this place sooner. I know that there will be many more days like this, but it’s sad to feel it creep in already.

Now I didn’t do anything wrong today per se. I didn’t drop my child or forget her somewhere. I didn’t lose my temper and yell at her. On paper, I did all that a parent is supposed to do.

I just let my selfishness win. I could feel my wants and desires coming before my baby’s. I could feel my frustrations coming from her not doing what I wanted, instead of her not having her needs met. It makes a big difference when you make the choice to die to yourself instead of letting your selfishness win. It makes more of a difference when your a parent.

Even though today wasn’t my greatest day, it was what today was. I’m thankful for getting a chance to vent and for fresh starts each day.

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